It's a strange state to be in right now, I feel like its already over. I am at my target body weight, no more, no less. After each of my heavy workouts this week I was already planning my training for 'next year' for that particular discipline. Analyzing my weakness's and determining what I'll need to do to overcome them. Funny too, in my mind I keep referring to it as 'next year' when in fact I mean after the comp. Perhaps the language I use reflects my commitment to competing next year.
Understand that 'competing is what drives me to train', but I do not compete to beat 'someone'. I revel in seeing someone lift heavy, get a PB, master a technique. Which is why I give my encouragement to Jo entering her first comp, pay tribute to Maria for the amazing jump she made in her squat last year and have great respect for the champions before me - Tegan, Teresa, Taylor from whom I can learn so much (maybe I need to change my name to something that starts with T) I admire all my 'competitors' who put in so much effort.... I'm babbling now and have gone off track. What I am trying to say is, my competitiveness is not personal, yes I strive to win, I want that as much as the next person, but I am not compelled by rivalry.
This year has been difficult without any local comps to keep me focused. I feel this has affected me adversely this year, my gains are not what I had anticipated, then again there has to be a point at which progress slows unless it's unnaturally enhanced and at my age that is not path I wish to follow. Hell I'm having enough 'issues' moving towards 'that time of life' without introducing more.
What a pensive, reflective and boring post that was, but I guess, continuing on that theme I'd like to take time now to thank Leigh. With all the crap that has come his way this year, he still managed to be there every Monday night to punish me in the squat rack - and he did this because he believes in me. I could not ask for any more than that. Thank you!
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